I meant "next" not "nest"

Sorry! I was home schooled..........and all that implies

Turd Hunt

It's Wednesday morning around 8:45 am. I got to work a few minutes early and decided to get a jump on breaks so I head out to start with the "young three's" class because frankly I like to get that room out of the way as quicklyy as possible. So I go outside on the big playground and sit nest to the sand box, immediately I start to smell the every present aroma of poop. So I begin to check hiney's, nope not that one.....next, nope not that one either. After a few bottoms I sit down to survey the butts already checked so I can begin again and I see a shoe with a huge clump of wet sand stuck to it. I look up to see who was wearing this shoe and realized that the poop smell was very strong at this particular moment..........CRAP, THAT'S NOT A WET CLUMP OF SAND!!! Found the poop! "Everyone line up we have to go inside!" So we all march in and I am met in the hallway with his teacher and gladly hand them over. Except I noticed that the wet clump of sand is gone? CRAP! Great, I get to go outside and hunt for this kids turd, and just this morning on my drive to work I was thanking God for this perfect, beautiful morning..........God really does have a sense of humor you know. So I grab some paper towels and start hunting, Thankfully I didn't have to go far, I reached down and grabbed it, twisted it up so I wouldn't have to smell the overwhelming smelly force and got to the nearest trash can. Like I always say...."Just another day in paradise!"

And now on my "QUEST FOR WEIGHT LOSS"
Didn't loose any poundage this past week but I ate allot of fried foods and sweet things so what should I expect right? But I did my first 5k this past Saturday and loved, loved, loved it! Will be doing more!!! And even though I was passed by "fat girl in a ballerina skirt" who I later introduced myself to and found out her name was Kelly, I think I did OK for my first race? 3.1 miles in 39 minutes at a walk/run. some of the more "fit" runners were already halfway through with their second time around by the time I was finishing but HEY! I still loved it, and I think I am more competitive than I thought I was? It really bothered me to get passed by "fat girl in a ballerina skirt" or "Kelly". I wanted to be with the people that were on the second time around in thirty minutes!!! And I will be if it kills me! Well not really, but I will press onward! I will beat "fat girl in a ballerina skirt" next time! If she's there? You watch, the nest time I blog about running I will at least make it to the finish line before the speed walkers!!! So until next time.....peace!

Young Love or Theramones?

So my 4 year old daughter already has a boyfriend! And they don't just call each other that, in fact the little boy denies it most of the time. It's they way they are when they're in their "zone". The way they look at each other, the  way they accidentally fall on top of each other just so they can be close.........I'm in so much trouble!!! The thing that boggles my mind is that neither one of them is perverted in any way! It's like this kind of affection just comes so naturally? They enjoy each others company and have little four year old conversations and tenderly kiss one another on the cheeks, and if I wasn't so freaked out that someday My daughter is gong to come home from cheer leading practice and announce that the quarterback got her pregnant I would actually think all of this was really sweet! Is it just innocent young love or is this a bird's eye view of what the future holds? Are some people more likely to lean towards this than others? Because my older son could care less about girls, he thinks their kind of annoying when they follow him around asking him to play..........why my only little girl? Why not my son so if he gets someone knocked up the other grandmother can raise the little twerp while the child parents finish high school?

Now on my QUEST FOR WEIGHT LOSS!!!! So far I have lost 10 lbs!
So this really cheesy book caught my attention because I am a sucker for cheesy self-help books. It's called "Women Food and God". And actually it's pretty good..........at least to me. It starts out by talking about the connection between food and Spirituality, which seems very far-fetched but to me it makes perfect sense. "You are what you eat" right? if you eat bad you get fat, and fat is gross. It means you are lazy and un-disciplined. It means that you have no self-control, you are a failure to yourself, to God, and to your family. IT is an obsession, one that you are reminded of every time you look in the mirror. But eventually you get to the place where you don't even have to look in the mirror, the image is burned into your head. And the self-loathing and binging start. Then you beat yourself up for binging, round and round we go, again and again and again. Then she talks about how when you realize that all this misery is not only self inflicted but unnecessary! What part of your life or your past can't you deal with? What pain, disappointment, loneliness, despair are you trying to escape? Everyone self-soothes is some way.........drugs, alcohol, work, food, sleep, shopping ect. you need time off, a break from your reality. But what if you just dealt with what your feeling? Your present reality, your disappointments. What if we chose to thrive in our everyday life instead of just "make it through" each day? What if it never gets any better than this? Is this vicious cycle of avoiding the real problem really better than just facing it? Is our pain that unbearable? Apparently it is for most of us. She quotes some Buddhist genius and says that the definition of hell is being where you are and spending all your time wishing you were somewhere else. I don't want to miss out on my life anymore because I'm too busy wishing for something else. Wishing I was thinner, wishing we had more money, wishing i loved my husband better, wishing i could slow down and enjoy my kids more. Wishing I was perfect. What the hell is the point?!!! Take in your life, it's beautiful, it's precious, there are thousands of moments that I will never get back because I spent them being disappointed in myself! It's madness! I don't want this obsession anymore! I want to be rid of it! i WANT TO LOOK FORWARD TO THINGS AGAIN! Deal with what life throws at me and take it in stride. I'm done living in hell when my life is actually Heaven on earth.

Crazy Little Things

I am trying to gather my thoughts on everything that has happened this week because no paticular incident sticks out really? Just allot of tiny happenings that make me laugh. Lets see......I was snotted on, druled on, snotted and druled at the same time, smelled poop that reminded me of death's very sting more times than i can count(feel sorry for sweetheart that changes them). Discussed with a co-worker how if a tornado was to pass over us we would get sucked up into the skylight and she asked me to please stop talking. Later she told me that wheather really freaks her out and it had been very stormy that day with a "tornado watch". A New little boy stole my heart, I went outside on the playground to give someone her break and was immediately ambushed by this little squirt with allot of "hey guess what?" "hey guess what?" When I asked him what his name was he said "lightening mqueen" and told me that his birthday was coming up and he was gonna have it at walmart! So when i asked him what his teacher calls him(to try to find out what his name was) he said "I told you already that my name is lightening mqueen!!!" I said "ok, what does your mommy call you?" "Bubba" he replied. I eventually found out what his name was and also that his Dad is a soldier in Iraq. So needless to say I fell for this little boy

The Bazzarre Nature of Women

When your a teenage girl, the only things on your mind is your appearance and guys. Which kind of goes together if you think about it? The better you look, the hotter the guy. And when you're a teenage girl hotness is all that really matters. Then you get a little older and start to think about marriage and the inside qualities of men. Will he be a good husband, good father, good provider? So you settle down with some nice guy that fits all of your "criteria", and depending on how shallow you are hopefully you are madly in love with them so you get married. Now if your like me(I'm not saying you are) you immediately begin picturing yourself with babies, babies and more babies!!! Because after all that will make your family complete and fulfill that "nurturing" side of you that has been screaming to get out. Then you and your husband start to notice people who have small children and the judging starts..........of beware of the judging!! Your in the grocery store, you see a woman with 3 small children and one is a newborn. Aw www he's so sweet, you want one so bad. Then one of the older children says "mommy I want cookies!!!" Mommy says " no sweetheart you've had enough sugar today so no cookies." the child throws herself on the floor screaming like someone is using a branding iron on her"I want cookies!!!! I want cookies!!! I hate you mommy!!!! I hate you!!" Mom rolls her eyes, newborn starts to bawl so mom starts to make a bottle and notices that the middle child is throwing bags of cereal on the ground and stomping on them saying " look mom, it's crunchy!!" Mom is shaking the bottle and shoving it in the baby's face with one hand, kicking the oldest with her foot yelling"get off the ground RIGHT NOW!!!!!!" With the hand that's free she grabs the middle child and flings her into the basket chucking the cereal back into the shelf still yelling at the oldest"YOU STOP THAT RIGHT NOW OR I'M GONNA TAKE YOU TO THE CAR AND WEAR YOU OUT!!!" The look on her face, the tone of her voice.............it's something you never want to be. And you convince yourself that you will never be! What a nightmare that mom was you think to yourself, Surely I will never get that fat and out of shape, that angry and mean, my kids will never behave that way you say. Honey, watch out!!! IT CAN AND WILL HAPPEN TO YOU! And whats even better is when this chaos is going on and someone tries to come up and give advice or "help". Then you tell of an innocent bystander who more than likely has good intentions. When does this change in your personality happen? How does it happen? I have no answers, I just know that something happens when that second child comes along, controlled chaos is your new reality. I see it everyday which makes me feel better about my own life to tell yo the truth. Moms come in the daycare with one child, still look pretty good. They had time to put makeup on and workout before they got here. Moms with 2 or more...........he he, it's a different story. Stressed, disheveled, and sleep-deprived. You have become your own worst nightmare, but for some reason you love every minute of it.

How many women does it take to use jumper cables effectively?

Actually there was only 3 of them actually doing anything, the rest of us were watching and cracking jokes. This all happened after work, around 6pm. A Grandparent of one of the little girls was already locked out of her car waiting for AAA when I saw a group of my co-workers huddles around "Tundra's" truck. (I am told this is her nickname...........I didn't ask why) Or her mother-in-law's truck which was hooked up to "Mel's" car. Now "Tundra's" truck(or whomsoever it is) is pretty tricky and apparently the problem was that the fuel pump switch was left on and drained the battery. So repeatedly she tried to start the truck and not much happened, after numerous life-threatening phone calls to her husband who is the reason we are all in this predicament, and after about 20 minutes Mel takes a look and says "THE JUMPER CABLES AREN'T EVEN ON RIGHT!!!" ARGHHHHH! Six women, wait no!!! Seven women and 20 minutes later and the stupid cables aren't even connected! Where are the stinkin' men when you need em'??!!! Excluding Tundra's husband which to remind you is why we are in this situation. So after about another 10 minutes is shutters to a rumbling start and they putter off and hopefully made it home. And all of this is after another fantastic day at Sunny Side, of which a little 3 year old girl pooped in her pants but her panties were too big so the turd slid down her leg and splattered on the floor which made an unimaginable mess. I didn't see it thank heavens but I'm sure it was lots of fun! Thank Goodness for the teacher the little girl was an employee child so her mom got to clean up. Oh and I weighed myself this morning and I've gained!!! But I refuse to give up........someday I will not feel my butt cheeks slapping together in rhythmic beats when I attempt to do a jumping jack. And someday I will stare at the most beautiful, scrumptious dessert and laugh in it's face(if it had a face) instead of hoovering it and feeling terrible later. And maybe, just maybe someday if I actually stick with it long enough my dress size will be back in the single digits. So as this day comes to an end I am sure of one thing: something equally or more interesting will happen tomorrow.

Me feeling guilty!

So I am still going to write these things but I have to be careful. I mean these are human lives I'm talking about here! I have to find a way to tell these stories without slandering anyone? How to do this? How to do this?.............Maybe I'll just write down what happens each day and re-cap on necessary history? What amazes me is how much history there is to be told in just 7 months!!! Something I have learned about working with a bunch of women is that almost every single relationship there is what you would call a "love-hate" relationship. There are a couple of people that you trust, allot of people that you talk to, and those few that get on your nerves a bit. The hard part about my job(as assistant director) is that I listen to complaining from everyone, about everyone and I'm supposed to stay neutral. This is very difficult for me because I am naturally a loyal friend and I make lots of friends. Only a select few do I truly trust but for the most part I believe the best about everyone. I recently have learned a very good lesson.............let me try to share without divulging too much information. I was in the "relationship-building process" with one of the girls there when one day we all noticed some bizarre face book posts. So being her friend I asked her if everything was OK, she proceeded to tell me personal information that blew my mind. I was immediately grieved by her situation and felt it my duty as a friend to help her out of it, and keep her accountable!!! BIG MISTAKE!! This went on for 2 or 3 weeks and eventually it was made apparent that she didn't want out of this situation, I felt really stupid for giving so much time and energy and thought and prayer.What a silly fool I was, anyway I was so angry that I vented to anyone that would listen. ANOTHER HUGE MISTAKE!!! It's not like me to betray some one's trust like that, regardless of what they have done to me but I snapped. Long story short a series of private facebook messages led to me apologizing(and her not apologizing) and some kind of peace was made. So to make a point I learned several things: 1. Listen but don't comment or have an opinion. 2. Keep your trap shut and try to stick with work to avoid drama. 3. Just because people are confiding in you, does not mean they actually want your help or advice! 4. If you consistently do 1,2 and 3 you will avoid allot of headaches and heartbreak. So I have put my big girl panties on and everyday that I walk through that booger covered door the awkwardness between us slowly gets easier to bear. Now on my QUEST FOR WEIGHTLOSS I press onward! Surely if I keep trying I will eventually win and my cottage cheesy butt and muffin-top midsection will shrink! If I could only stop eating so much I would probably be successful? What makes it so dang hard is all the perfectly toned moms that come strutting into the daycare. Every Time I pass one in the hallway any sort of self-esteem or confidence I have is immediately deflated. The big fake perky boobs, the rock hard abs(even though they've had as many children as I have) the buns that you could bounce a coin off of. I think I'll go for a jog(or maybe just eat a hot fudge sundae). Happy Monday!